For years, I tried being patient with Peter, my husband, and reasoning about splitting bills and housework. But he ignored me, sticking to outdated views.
Peter and I have been married for six years. I earn more, and after my promotion, I worked long hours, while Peter worked a steady job ending at 4:00 p.m. Despite that, he expected me to do all the cooking and chores, claiming it was the wife’s role.
It wasn’t just chores—it was also money. When we argued over splitting a takeaway, Peter insisted I should pay if I didn’t cook. That’s when I realized he was taking advantage of me.
I worked 70-hour weeks, came home exhausted, and still had to hear complaints about dinner while he relaxed. He did minimal chores, and I ended up covering everything financially: rent, groceries, bills, and even his fishing gear.
The breaking point came when Peter, drunk, boasted in front of friends that he didn’t need to worry about money because I was covering everything. That’s when I decided enough was enough.
A few weeks later, Peter suggested a vacation and expected me to pay. I turned it on him, saying since he was the “man of the house,” he should pay. He was stunned. I told him if he didn’t want to split things fairly, I’d only pay for what I used—just like he’d been doing to me.
Peter realized he couldn’t maintain his lifestyle without my support. He started cooking, stopped complaining about bills, and acknowledged our marriage needed to be a partnership.
I’d paid for vacations, clothes, and luxuries for years while he spent on hobbies. He thought “that’s how marriage works” until I proved him wrong.
After I suggested counseling and he laughed it off, I made it clear: I wanted respect. If he couldn’t give that, he’d feel the imbalance.
Now, Peter’s trying, and he’s learning to appreciate my efforts. If he ever forgets, I’ve got plenty of receipts to remind him.
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